I Just Don't Know

I feel ashamed saying I feel helpless.  But I do.  Here I can walk, talk, feed myself, get up and go whenever I want, cry and throw fits when I want, laugh when I want and yet I feel completely helpless.  But feeling this way also makes me feel ashamed because my mom's ALS prevents her from doing even the most simple things in life.  I wish I had answers for the what comes next or here's what we should do now but I have none. None.  She's becoming increasingly more tired.  We thought it might be due to a switch in her thyroid medication, but that doesn't appear to be the case.  She's losing pretty much all ability to walk.  While she hasn't been walking more than a hallway's length that hallway was part of the remaining independence she had.  Now that seems to be going away.  Her legs just don't respond to her brain telling them to move.  I can't even imagine what that is like.  When my mom was mobile she was superwoman.  You couldn't tell her a woman couldn't do something because she'd find a way.  Physically if she willed it it would happen. Now will just isn't enough.  I'm trying to figure this one out through God's eyes and I just can't.  She doesn't deserve this and none of her free will choices brought this upon her.